Baby on Board
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IMDB rating: 4.30 Plot: Life for a successful power couple get thrown for a loop when the wife finds out she’s pregnant. |
Actors: Bartlett Tommy,Chu Henry,Corbett John,Enriquez Ithamar,Fojtik Gene,Hidalgo Jaiden,Hodges Jor’don,jr. John Rainone,Kierscht Charles,LaRaviere Michael P.,Lawson Jordan,O’Connell Jerry,Shah Vivek,Sills Brian,Sr. Dion Strowhorn,Comedy,
How can I forgive my mother for abandoning me?
OK, I’m going to try my hardest to sum up/shorten this story but PLEASE read it, I really need some help.
My parents divorced when I was 2 years old and until I was 13 years old they had split custody of me and my sister (one week with mom one week with dad). When I was 13, my mom began dating an inmate. She is a paralegal and at the time had taken up a job working for the state, helping inmates with their parole cases. She took us to visit him every other weekend so we could "develop a relationship with him" since he was going to move in with us when he was released. She told us not to tell our dad and we didn’t. The day the inmate was released, my dad found out and got temporary custody of us. He took my mom to court, filing for full custody. During the custody battle, my mom ran off and married the man and got pregnant. She then told us she couldn’t fight our dad anymore and that she had a baby on the way and was going to have a new family.
This was 7 years ago (I’m 21 now). She now has 3 children with him. During the past 7 years hes been in and out of rehab and prison again and put her through hell (you wouldn’t believe the stories… crack-cocaine is his drug of choice… makes people do horrible things). For the first 5 and half years, I continued to have a relationship with her. She relied on me to rescue her, loan her money, and do so much more. I got fed up when (after not hearing from her for over a month) she asked me to loan her money for the down payment on a new house, in a town two hours away. She was moving to the town where her husband was in rehab. I haven’t seen her since she moved in November 2008 and I stopped answering/returning her phone calls in February 2009. My sister still has a relationship with her and told me this – mom moved back in town last December, filed for divorce, and just found out last week her now ex-husband has bone cancer.
Its been so hard not having much parental guidance these past few years and not speaking with my mom for a year has really taken a toll on me. I need a mother or a father or some adult to care about me and support me and give me guidance especially being at such a crucial time in my life (I’m about to graduate from college). After my dad won the custody battle, he sent me to boarding school and kept my sister at home and in her same high school. Hes a whole other story, but in a nutshell I have no relationship with him either.
Should I forgive them? How do I forgive my mother? What do I do? Any input is appreciated, I’ve been in and out of counseling, therapy, etc. and it hasn’t helped so any words of wisdom will be helpful. Please help me :-/
your mother abandoned you??? noob ^^
phily | Feb 04, 2010
i dunno
Dannyboy | Feb 04, 2010
wow, I can’t even imagine how that must be for you. Parents should never ask their children to loan them money.. ugh that’s just ridiculous. It’s almost like you’re more of a parent to her than she is to you. Maybe you should just have a conversation with her about how you feel about everything she’s done/is doing and maybe she’ll be willing to change for you. I wish I could help more!
good luck!!
Paige L | Feb 04, 2010
I feel for you, I really do. Plain and simple, your mother is a bitch and both of your parents should be ashamed. I say you save up and move a couple states away. You are 21 after all. Only keep in touch with your friends and sister. I mean, it sounds a little harsh but for real, they really haven’t been there for you it seems like. Or, just get an apartment and get your sister to move in with you because if you have been through this much, I am sure she has been too. Starting over seems to be a reasonable thing to do doesn’t it? I REALLY wish you the best of luck and please, stay strong! Don’t let them get to you. I am sure you are a beautiful human being and you deserve much more than you have right now.
Austin | Feb 04, 2010
She is the one with the problem not you! Stop thinking you are unlovable. You show good sence. She is your mother, But not the one you deserve. She may make a change in her life at some point for the better. She may not. You can honor your mother by being better. Be a good parent to your own children someday. The parent you desreve to have.
christine | Feb 04, 2010
Hi, Im Chinese. my parents do not abandon me , but they didnt take care of me when I was child.They like gambling and having fun themselves, I had to take care of myself even when I was just 6, and I have a younger sisiter, we depend on each other. I have to cook and wash clothes for all my families and other housework, I dont know how to express that hard time. But really bitter, I hated them, but as time goes, they change attiude to us, and afforded me to go to college,(it is a pround thing that someone live in China rural area goes to college ) acctural , they treat me well I know, they become old now, also I can earn money, sometimes, I still think they love money than me, but I found that im stupid, no matter how, they are my parents, they give me life. Since they come back to me , why I refuse them ????? so do you . Life will be pefect with parents. Past has been history, why do not start a new life? Every makes mistakes, we should forgive them since they want to remedy for the mistakes. Families are the most rare persons to us. So please cherish, do not make the same mistakes to your parents though they hurt you before
Victory | Feb 04, 2010
You have a very sad childhood. But you were strong and had managed to keep your sanity in the face of all these obstacles. Your parents did not performed their duties as they should have.
But let’s look at the bright side: your father’s winning custody of you and your sister saved the both of you from the suffering that your step-father would have caused. Your mother’s abandoning the custody fight also saved you from suffering her fate. In your father’s house, you managed to grow and reached college and you will be graduating.
You will be own your own soon. As an adult, you can make your own decision. You do not have to forgive them but if you can still find the love in you to love them, then love them (if I am correct, you still love them, otherwise, you would not have struggled with this question). They are your parent, no matter what (although a poor one).
Don’t let your anger blind you. One day they will be gone. Will you look back and regrets the things you have never done with your parents because you cannot forgive or love them? Will you be able to live in peace with yourself? If you cannot, then why not make peace now?
Good luck.
Normad | Feb 04, 2010